19
Nov

the paralysis of perfection

   Posted by: Rabia   in motivation, short stories, writing process

I admit it, I’m one of those moms who gets twitchy every time one of my kids colors outside the lines or decides that orange lettuce and purple tomatoes make an appetizing-looking salad. I was very uptight about the whole “place your sticker correctly in the space, properly aligned” and “follow directions to a T” business when the Firstborn was starting out on activity books, hovering to make sure he was doing it “right”. I’m pleased to note that my expectations of toddler and preschooler fine motor skills are far less unrealistic today than they were two years ago. While the Firstborn was made to color things yellow because darnit, that’s what the directions said to do, the Princess has the freedom to pick from a rainbow of choices. She is also free to pick markers over crayons, because really, markers are just plain more fun to color with.

The point of all this being that once upon a time my attitude was: if it can’t be done right, then it won’t be done at all.

Perfectionism is a beast I battle quite regularly in all areas of my life. It’s like a many-headed Hydra; if I chop one head off, it sprouts another as soon as my back is turned. Just this week I balked at actually starting any of the short stories spinning in my head on the pretext that they weren’t ready.

Well, the truth is that I wasn’t ready to write anything less than perfect.

Once I got to the root cause of my procrastination, I pulled out that trusty old Sword of Slaying and hacked off yet another head of the perfectionism beastie. Then I opened up Word and got a start on two of the stories.

Progress is miserably, painfully slow and I’m avoiding reading what little I’ve written, but at least it’s happening.

Oh, and today? The Firstborn got out a sticker book his grandfather gave him for his birthday and, aside from helping him find which stickers went with the pages he wanted to do, I did not watch him at all.

There’s hope for me yet.

17
Nov

This post, brought to you by YouTube

   Posted by: Rabia   in inspiration, random

I may not be writing these days (baby has become very picky about how he wants to sleep–ie: in my arms, as much as posssible, as often as possible), but I have been enjoying other people’s creativity on YouTube.

So, here is my all-time YouTube favorite video: a duo miming a marital spat to Beethoven’s Fifth:

Here is the family favorite; my older two love Eighteen Wheels on a Big Rig:

Next up are Kryptonite AMVs. Here’s one with clips from Final Fantasy VIII, and another set to Kingdom Hearts. Yes, watching video game clips set to Kryptonite really is an eccentric hobby of mine, as my unfortunate husband can attest to. It must drive him crazy to hear the same song playing over and over and over again but he has not, as yet, put his fist through my laptop. :D

What do you like to watch on YouTube?

13
Nov

mea culpa

   Posted by: Rabia   in website tinkering

Sorry for the gi-normous pictures that you’ve been suffering through! I think I’ve fixed the problem. Here, have a puppy–see post below!

13
Nov

testing…

   Posted by: Rabia   in website tinkering

12
Nov

the creative family

   Posted by: Rabia   in creativity, kids at play, reviews

a leaf? or a tree? created by the Firstborn

You may have already noticed that we do a lot of messy art projects around here, involving glue (sticky!), paint (staining!) and scissors (risky!). I am also far too ready to display the kids’ creations on the blog and on my walls (you should see my living room–it displays everything from the Husband’s cross-stitch, to his grandmother’s paintings, to collages and drawings by the kids. Come to think of it, everything up on those walls was created by a family member). I’m big into encouraging creativity, and my hope is that as I continue to write and draw and crochet (yeah, I’m taking that up again–long story!) and experiment with new ways to express myself, the little ones will follow right along. I want to give them the skills and the space to work on their art–whatever form that might take–so that the words “I’m bored” will be heard very rarely in my house.

And, incidentally, if they’re busy with their projects, I’ll be free to pursue mine.

I like the idea of kids and adults learning together, of pursuing interests side by side, so when I saw The Creative Family by Amanda Soule (of the blog SouleMama), I went posthaste to my library’s website to put a hold on a copy.

This is a gentle book, stressing a simple life filled with art, nature, play and imagination. It is like warm apple cider drunk near a fire on a winter night, something sweet, hint of spice, going down easy. Within its pages are some simple cloth-and-yarn crafts (like finger knitting which is awesome!); tips for making room for the creative life (supplies, finding space, making time); an emphasis on handmade, reusing and tradition; calls to go out into nature; simple props for child’s play. Some of the ideas that I’m planning on incorporating are family drawing time, putting together a box of dress-up clothes, clothesline and pegs for picture display, beginning embroidery with burlap and tapestry needle. It satisfies my fantasy for family harmony, comfortable silences, a simple life.

And there is, for me, the downside of this book. The writer portrays her family life as idyllic and by contrast, my life seems full of cross squabbling children, tired short-tempered parents, an overwhelmingly messy and cluttered house. Giving my kids free rein with art supplies leads to broken and ground crayons, drifts of half-drawn-on papers, paint all over my daughter’s clothes and face and hair. Sometimes, the kids’ creativity leads them to scribble on the walls or bang on homemade with drums right in my ear while I’m cooking dinner. Sometimes, in spite of my encouragement, they’d rather be whacking each other on the head with Tinkertoy swords than do art or put on plays or go for a walk.

But thanks to this book, I have additional ideas in my arsenal to help me create that “perfect” home life *g*.

9
Nov

the Plan

   Posted by: Rabia   in season of rains, short stories

I love Plans! And now I have one!

So, here is my writing Plan for the rest of the year:

  • Write short stories. These may or may not include: an Elinor story; a story set in the Out of Shape world; a retelling of Beauty and the Beast; something to submit to Beneath Ceaseless Skies; the story I came up with while drawing a wall with lots and lots of bricks, the Captive Xenobiologist who has been begging me to rescue her soon, please, okay? thanks; something else entirely.
  • Playful, low-key planning of Kai’s book. (Maybe I can even come up with a title. That would rock.)
  • AND, if my beta readers get back to me soon-ish: If their edits are light, I will happily re-revise Season of Rains before sending it to my second-round betas; if the comments are more along the lines of “this is broken like a very broken thing”, then I will spork my eyes, throw myself a pity party, and sulk for several days. And re-revise next year.
7
Nov

the princess and the pea

   Posted by: Rabia   in Uncategorized

The Firstborn’s latest passion is castles (and knights and crowns and kings and all those sorts of castle accessories). Yesterday, the Husband dropped by the library and picked up a castle-themed tote bag (I love our library!) filled with books, puppets and activity ideas.

One of those books was a retelling of The Princess and the Pea.

I’ve always been puzzled by that story. True nobility is measured by how a coddled woman who has (obviously) never done a good day’s honest work is unable to sleep well at night? (She’s probably not an accomplished rider, either, huh?). What makes a princess is that she has never been exposed to physical discomfort (and we are supposed to applaud that?)?

I’m sorry, but she seems like a useless ninny to me.

And why was she wandering around at night in the middle of the storm, anyway? Where were her legions of guards and maids to protect her from the harsh realities of life? I suspect some kind of sinister plot here (yeah, she’s stupid AND evil! *grin*).

Am I missing the deeper meaning of this story? Or is it really as superficial and shallow as I think it is?

What say you, gentle readers?

6
Nov

malaise

   Posted by: Rabia   in season of rains

SoR progress: 249/249 pages.

So, this revision is done and sent to two trusty beta readers. There are still some minor details I need to take care of (fixing the astrological system, coming up with an alternate to rather lame minor plot point, for examples) but I’d rather hold off on the cosmetic parts until I find out whether or not I need to do heart surgery on this thing.

I’ve had a case of the blahs all week. They started Sunday, so I’m blaming the time change. That, and too much cheap Halloween candy, the week-long misery of my runny-nosed runny-eyed daughter and the fact we’ve been cooped up because of it. But the weekend is in sight and I’m feeling a lot more chipper this afternoon. Now if only I can get excited about one of the many writing projects on to my platter…

Start a novel or write a short story? Decisions, decisions.

3
Nov

about writers

   Posted by: Rabia   in writing process

I’m reading G. K. Chesterton’s Orthodoxy and came across the following about how he came to write the book:

“I will begin to worry about my philosophy,” said Mr. Street, “when Mr. Chesterton has given us his.” It was perhaps an incautious suggestion to make to a person only too ready to write books upon the feeblest provocation.

and

After a long pause I replied, “I will go home and write a book in answer to that question.” This is the book that I have written in answer to it.

These made me laugh because I, too, am only too willing to turn every flirtatious idea and vaguely intriguing premise into a book. When I read a novel, I think, “That secondary character is way cooler than the MCs” and instantly set about trying to pry said character loose from the story and pilfer him or her in such a way that no one would notice (for advice on how to do this, see Holly Lisle’s article How to (Legally and Ethically) Steal Ideas). News articles and blog posts gives me plot twists and bizarre circumstances. Nonfiction gives me cool worldbuilding details. My mind has been trained to look at everything as potential book fodder.

What are your favorite quotes about writers?

2
Nov

home delivery

   Posted by: Rabia   in inspiration, kids at play

pattern block truck

This is a truck carrying money, strawberries, washing machines, new tires and wagons from the bank to someone’s house. Apparently, nothing falls out when the truck goes uphill. Which is a good thing because no one wants to be hit by a washing machine while driving on the highway.

I wish the bank would deliver stacks of money to my house, but alas, I think I’ll be waiting in vain.

Incidentally, I spent a good chunk of one night lying awake, trying to come up with a magic system inspired by pattern blocks and/or tangrams. No luck yet, but I’m amused by this melding of my two little worlds.